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Democracy Is A Moneky's AffairA couple of days back we published the article La Linea. In it we described the issues surrounding the events taking place in Guatemala as they prepare to indict a large number of high officials of the previous government. Today, we will follow-up with subsequent events as we discuss the points of view and attitudes of the person that will, most likely, become the next Guatemalan president. This person is Jimmy Morales, a character.


This person is a comic actor. Oh… and a politician. Why not? We all know how well actors behave as politicians. He has almost no experience, having joined a party in 2013… He may as well, since we all know how well other politicians with experience have done. And… that’s pretty much it!


Jimmy has some really, really weird positions in politics as he claims to be religious and anti-system (whatever it may mean). Let’s take a look.


He is most decidedly anti-abortion. Why? He does not explain exactly but his general gist is that because of religious principles. Sure. Personal principles, on the other hand, do not matter. The state is sovereign. The state is father and the state is mother. Got it.

For the death penalty

Why is he for the death penalty? Again, we don’t know since he is not very explicit on the subject. It may be because of religious points of view (although we are pretty sure that the Church is against it, considered that their savior was murdered… but who are we to argue…). But then again, he may be capitalizing on the fury of the “populous” that are quite pissed off to their previous president… and vice-president… and ministers… and functionaries… and… you get the gist.

Homosexual matrimony

In this case we have a very strong argument for his point of view “I reject it because I don’t believe in it”. Yes ladies and gentlemen! Finally, a well-constructed, well-developed rationalization with profound philosophical and religious significance supporting the taking of such a revolutionary point of view. “Because I don’t believe in it”.

In a sense, Jimmy is doing us a great favor. As he has no idea how to be a politicians, he has not yet learned the subtle ways of deception. Thus, he blurbs whatever pops into his mind and this is, typically, the truth. And why is this important? Because most politicians act in the same manner but they disguise such actions under several layers of statistics, polls, analysis and … let’s never forget… the dedicated work of an army of spin-doctors.

But not Jimmy. No sir. Jimmy will tell you how it is… and the entire concept of democratic representation be damned! Because Jimmy does not believe in it. Got it.

Maintain marihuana prohibition

And why would he do so? Because “Guatemala has nothing to do with Uruguay. … Our health system is in a state of collapse due to illness and if a larger drug addiction would be generated, we could not confront it”. Aha. Uhu. Soo… people cannot make decisions about their own body because the Guatemalan socialistic health system has collapsed. Aha. Uhu. And who collapsed the system in the first place? Governments. Why did they do so? To capture votes. Did they know that such a system was not viable? Of course! So, basically, Guatemalans do not have the right to smoke pot because incompetent politicians made pathetic decisions in the past guided by their own greed. Got it.

Public support

And how does Jimmy support this overall point of view? Because “in Guatemala 97% of the population has Christian ethical thinking”. Aha. Uhu. And we are 99.3667265 % sure that he cannot back that statistic with scientific proof. But we are also about 96.36578925523888 % sure that he is pulling that number out from where the light does not shine. In addition, we are about 98.4778892390928347990283749% sure that he is the biggest current joke in politics and neither he nor his voters are aware of it. But that’s just us.

Camon! Seriously! 97% !!! A brainwashing cult would be deliriously happy with that number!


But the whole story does not end here. Let’s review a few of Jimmy’s points.

Political Indifference

According to Jimmy “Guatemala has suffered a great deal of political indifference; [people] have allowed governments to do whatever they wanted to do”.


Not like Jimmy who will impose his points of view on anybody else, whether they want it or not. Because, you know, 97% of the Guatemalan population think as I do. Because, you know, my incredible powers of deduction, observation and… what the heck… mindreading allow me to do so. Sure. Why not? And while we are at it, let’s throw in a bunny rabbit, a few mirrors and a great deal of smoke… of the hallucinogenic type… you know. Just for a good measure.

It is downright laughable that a joker by profession acknowledges that nobody gives a darn about a government he is fighting so hard to get in! Hummm… and why would people choose to ignore governments? Perhaps because they are irrelevant? Perhaps because people has learned that they are less that useless causing more misery than anything else? Perhaps because people realize that governments are independent from the people and that that’s precisely how democracy is supposed to operate?

Naaaaa…. Can’t be that.

Must be something to do with Christian ethical thinking… or sun spots… yeah… that sounds better.

Jimmy, my man, look; it simple.

People just want to be left alone.

People are fed-up of governments.

People are fed-up of being robbed by governments.

Oh… yeah… and that includes politicians!


Jimmy offers us a guarantee should he be elected. We quote “My guarantee (with the citicenship in regards that I won’t become corrupt) is my past. I don’t have other”

Oh… so… voters must accept your word as with any other politician, right? But if Jimmy is sooooo honest and won’t become corrupt then why not have a contract? For example, if he is found corrupt then he forfeits all his properties and wealth. That would be a written guarantee people can trust. But no. We need to trust him. You know… because of his many years of political experience as comedian and because … you know… stuff… yeah.. that one.


The truth is that besides being a good joke, we have no idea whatsoever if Jimmy will or won’t become corrupted. But in the end this does not matter. What matters is his corrupt political thinking. His absolute belief that he is right and everybody is not. That somehow he can read the minds and wishes of all voting Colombian citizens… and that those wishes are all the same!

Let’s put things into perspective. What do you think would happen if such a person would walk into a mental hospital and declare such beliefs? That’s right! It would be bye-bye outside world and hello rubber-padded room. But no. Just because Jimmy is a politician he has “credibility” no matter how ludicrous his political thinking may be.

Whether a politician is corrupt or not is not what produces most of the damage to our standards of living. What produces such damage is the corrupt thinking of politicians which is based on democratic thinking. The notion that everything can be controlled and that everything needs controlling in the first place... for the greater good.

But you think you are OK because you don't live in Guatemala, right? Think again. Do you think that Jimmy's attitude is any different from the attitude of your politicians? Of course not. The themes change but the attitude remains the same.

But you don’t believe us. That’s OK. That’s your right. Keep voting. Keep placing your faith for a better world in politicians. You are only staking the future of humanity to a bunch of egomaniacs. What’s the worst that can happen?

Note: please see the Glossary if you are unfamiliar with certain words.

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